Finding happiness

Dear Mol,

Of late, mummy has been talking about self -love, care, respect, esteem….

I was a child dearly attached to my family. For whatever achievements I had good words, treats and what not...none of which was a shortage. I learned a bad habit on the way- saying negative things about myself to receive a positive word and elevated expectations from others to boost my image.

 

Amidst my beautiful family, being pregnant with you

But when I came to Australia, those kind words came across the phone only. I started missing being “the child”.

Mol have you actually scrutinised these situations?

1. Why is that after an achievement, despite having a lot of positive feedback… that one snide remark is like a pin on the balloon?
2. Why is that after years of trying to achieve  that difficult goal, your happiness was short lived?
3.  Why is that you felt lost out even after reaching 99% of the targets and you were never “GOOD ENOUGH”.
4. Why is that you feel certain situations keep bombarding you all the time and not the others? 

WHY?

These are situations mummy knows too well. But the lessons learnt now are better than the lessons not learnt at all.

My dear Mol, child is indeed the symbol of innocence, beauty , acknowledgement, love and hope. It is in that period every milestone is eagerly awaited, with excitement and days are rosy and the room smells of excitement and happiness. As we grow up, we are imposed with goals which become the building blocks of our life.

your first steps

Mol think of the four situations I have put through to you….

You are the sole master of your life, not the situations you come across.

There is still that inner child in you who yearns for your attention and love. Give it abundant love and respect. Picture yourself as that beautiful 5 year old filling your home with peals of laughter, hope and joy. Try the following I have researched and have been actively practicing.

my 28th day

1. Do deep breathing for 10 minutes as soon as you are awake. After all breath is the vehicle of your life.
2. Eat, hydrate and say positive words to yourself. If a guest visits you, these will be of your highest priority. Your inner child relishes the same.
3. Whilst finalising a goal, break it down to small manageable chunks. Acknowledge your inner child each time you accomplished a task. Remember it is the tiny steps, actions and decisions which make a better tomorrow.
4. Assess your day critically at the end of each day. Visualise the beautiful 5 year old in you...Acknowledge the good deeds of the day. It can be anything from not losing your temper to eating healthy or even sorting out a drawer.
5. Make a list of things to improve upon. One could be to reduce Facebook time and thinking negative.
6. Drastically reduce expectations from other. When encountering negative words remember “it is not about me, ITS ABOUT THEM”.
7. As one of your Elemas put, " Know yourself well.  Develop the grace to take in constructive critisicms while turning a blind eye on the demeaning ones".
8. Complementing anyone for making your day a tad better never hurts. Ponder…Creating some life’s better moments never creates a hole in your pocket.

Mol as we grow older, the people who always make us happy may not be with us physically in the same room. But wherever you go, whatever you do, if you can duly acknowledge yourself, you will be happy.

Happiness is not an accident, it is an intentional effect.

Love

Mummy